This is goodbye from me.
I'm afraid I was wrong all these years to seek solice in atheism. Jesus is in fact real and living inside us all. He loves you very much. Yes that's right, I've found God. It wasn't easy, but I've finally found the truth. I know how hard it can be to let go of your atheism, but trust me, once you're on this side the grass really is greener. So, well I'm off to find some Christian forums and leave you lot who've been so good to me this last year or so.
God bless you
Jacob
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I didn't buy it for a second.
You get a F for April Fools.
Hey wait Jacob, the atheist Jesus is the real deal, please don't desert him, he has suffered enough. Why keep beating up on him. Are the buddhists the ones that will save the tortured jesus ? Poor jesus ...... I hate xains , so I must try to heal them.
Yeah jesus, love the enemy ..... Buddha wept too ....
Jacob , you got me crying again .....
Atheism Books.
What a coincidence. Last night I decided to become a Scientologist.
NOT!
Matt Shizzle has been banned from the Rational Response Squad website. This event shall provide an atmosphere more conducive to social growth. - Majority of the mod team
he was behind the couch the whole time wasn't he?
Maybe the phase of the moon last night brought new understanding to us all. As I was sleeping I had a dream. I saw the spirit of understanding. He showed me all that I had rejected. The weight of all the Truth pressed upon me, lo it was a heavy weight. Suddenly I knew I had wasted all these years nit-picking the word of knowledgeable evangelists. I had revealed in me the understanding of the Bible and the Koran. I had been pursuing a worldview of ultimate meaninglessness. I promised the spirit I would rectify my evil sins. He told me even I, a lowly sinner am loved and can yet be saved. I finally saw the face of the spirit; yeah it was the face of a dedicated devotee to God. I screamed in terror, it was the face of Jerry Falwell. Damn, I hate nightmares.
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"I guess it's time to ask if you live under high voltage power transmission lines which have been shown to cause stimulation of the fantasy centers of the brain due to electromagnetic waves?" - Me
"God is omnipotent, omniscient, omnibenevolent, - it says so right here on the label. If you have a mind capable of believing all three of these divine attributes simultaneously, I have a wonderful bargain for you. No checks please. Cash and in small bills." - Robert A Heinlein.
It was actually gone midday when I wrote that.
That said, I knew it wasn't yet midday for most of the people on here. Yes that was a particularly bad April fool, and even worse if you actually fell for it.
Atheist Books
This is not fun, April fools sucks.
It would be a better joke if somebody bombed as much churches as possible.
Holy shit. That sounds fucking terrible.
"The whole conception of God is a conception derived from ancient Oriental despotisms. It is a conception quite unworthy of free men."
--Bertrand Russell
There is no god but Allah and Muhammed was his prophet! Aiiiiiiiii.