I can't figure out who is dumber...the kid who stole the wafer in a ziplock bag to show his non-catholic friend ("Hey Fred, look!  This here is teh Jesus!&quot or the Catholics thinking that stealing a wafer equals a hatecrime...or the Catholics pissed off over the "theft" of a 1 inch cube of bread/flat piece of bread.  I would have hoped the kid would have been smart enough to test the bread in a lab to show once and for all that it is literally a piece of  bread and does not contain flesh.  I swear, Christians get dumber every week.

Remarkable. Someone steals a piece of flat bread, recieves death threats for it, and he's the one being labelled as having commited a hate crime by the people sending him death threats. It is as Rook says: Christians get dumber every week.

Unleavened bread.

I was raised in the Greek Catholic church, not the Roman rite (not until much later).  At my church, we received cubes of leavened bread.

I've read that back in mideval times the idea of this happening was terrifying to Catholics - they feared that Jews (or Moslems or anyone else they didn't like) would do something like this in order to torure Jesus - as they truly believed it was the body of Christ (as if chewing it wouldn't be painful to him were this so!) They actually made it a crime - "Host desecration." Throwing it down and pissing on it would be more shocking/funny.

how many of you grew up catholic...

But I really miss eating that bread...they are awesome...

kinda spongy, melt in your mouth crackers.....

Yeah!  Me too.  It was such an interesting little ritual thing.

Why do us humans find ritualistic behaviour so interesting?

Kind of like having a secret handsake and shit.  In the Baptist churches you can't partake of the Lord's Supper until after you have accepted Jesus and been Baptised.  So it was like a sign that you were "part of the club".

What was amazing to me was that you could not touch God/Jesus because he was 'holy'. Yet you could chew him up, you could vomit him up or turn him into shit in your intestines. I asked a priest about this when we studied the digestive system, how long does the bread remain Christ? He said one hour, which is why one could not eat within one hour of of taking communion. Apparently Jesus gets pissed off if you mix him with other food(who wouldn't), but water is OK.

Can you?

If you grew up in a church with the average weekly attendance of 30-45 people then it's pretty obvious to everyone who has and hasn't been "saved".

You live in a small town like I used to, Matt.

I was raised in a church that my family had attended for over a century.

Everyone practically knew every time I took a dump.  And that went for most everyone else.  I could have lined everyone one up and told you who had been baptised or not even at the age of 10 years old.

Of course, you can lie.  That's what xtians do best!

I was thinking if you were going to pull this sort of stunt to go a few towns over and say you were of the same church. Or if you did move go to the equivalent. I have a more evil mind than most people. There are 2 churches in my town, but they are pretty much the harmless type (one is a UCC the other something similar.) They have people go there but they don't bother those of us who don't. Funny thing is a few years ago one was struck by lightning.

What were we saying about moderates and extremists? Take a bit of wafer away from a moderate and suddenly you are getting death threats! They are all so kooky.

Putting Jesus body in a plastic bag is a hate crime, but eating him is not? These bastards are nuts!

I wonder what woulda happened if he'd fed it to a squirrel.

Hey,  but yeehaw errr,  I mean,  yahweh really gets off on sendin' all those sinners for the gnashing of teeth ritual, don't he ?  And since jesus has already endured, what could a few more teeth hurt ?

OK....now I'm recalling the opening moments of the movie starring Robert Duvall as Lt. Col. Bull in "The Ace", or as it was later titled, "The Great Santini".

Anyone else recall, the famous faked barf scene ???  Hee-hee

Get them spoons ready !

They serve grape juice for those who don't wish to consume alcohol.

Always check for the warning... May contain traces of nuts, Jesus and Jesus nuts.

They give you a choice: body(wafer) or blood(wine). Catholic doctrine(Greek Orthodox as well, IIR) states that receiving either is the same as receiving both. This is signified by the little piece of wafer that the priest drops into the chalice during the consecration. The Greek Orthodox(again, IIR) offer both species on a spoon, so I'm not sure what they would do. But the Catholics would just offer one or the other, depending on what your particular problem was. I don't if the issue of both allergies has ever come up.

The various Protestant churches have beliefs all over the map, from being almost Catholic in terms of practice to allowing Pepsi and soda crackers(and I even recall, pizza, in one extreme case).

So what happens when the Jesus wafers go stale and inedible?

You eat them anyway I've had more than a few which weren't exactly fresh tasting. If there is some actual defect(mold, fell down and got stepped on, etc), then they either put it in a place to rot(once it loses the appearance of bread, it's no longer considered Christ's flesh, which is also what digestion falls under) or, I think they can be buried under some circumstances. But they usually only consecrate enough for that Mass, with a few left over for adoration(putting up the host in a special container for people to pray to) or to be distributed to the home-bound. I remember spending hours in front of a piece of bread, praying for faith. I guess it didn't work

Unconsecrated hosts(as they are called) require no particular veneration, and can be thrown out at will.

Well, there was some confusion over dinner when Jesus said to Mary Magdalene, "Yo, my cutie with a bootie. Eat me."

So we end up with millions of people with a bread fetish.

Hmmmmm can you say the "Get Excommunicated Challenge" for anyone who is still technically Catholic? I do remember a member on here a while back mentioning he got excommunicated for spitting out the host right in front of the bishop.

The Non-prophets podcast just issued the "Eucharist challenge" comparing it to the Blasphemy Challenge - though they don't expect it to be as succesful - to send them a eucharist wafer. PZ Meyers also asked something similar. They said maybe put enough of them together to make a Jesus voodoo doll! Or maybe put him back together.

*** EDIT ***

They also mentioned it's official church policy that if someone tries something like this people are to physically restrain them and take the cracker away from them. That's assault!

Haha, this reminds me of when I had a cold or something and vomited horribly in the middle of chapel when I was in first grade. Everyone's head was bowed, the pastor was praying, and then hehe.

I hadn't taken communion at that point though. In the Lutheran church, you are baptized as a baby by your parents, but apparently that's not good enough. You have to confirm your parents' decision when you are old enough (usually about age 13 or 14) by getting confirmed. Only then are you eligible for communion. I went through the whole tedious process, which was sort of like a year-long class, with assigned bible readings and worksheets and memorization for homework, just for some lousy bread and grape juice. Anyone want to hear the apostles' creed?

then gawd is punishing them with Celiac Disease for being a persistent heretic