How to deal with people "praying" for me.
Posted on: August 10, 2009 - 8:49pm
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How to deal with people "praying" for me.
Can I ask you guys how do you handle someone who says that they will "pray" for you because you don't believe. I am talking about chrisitians of course. Whenever debating one of them and they end with, "I will pray for you", it drives me nuts. I think it is extremly arrogant and selfish thing to say. Anyone have any good come backs. And I would prefer them to be something intelligent and not just an insult.
"Take all the heads of the people
and hang them up before the Lord
against the sun.” -- Numbers 25:4
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I know how you feel man. I would just leave it with a sarcastic "Thaaaanks". Or how about "Don't waste your breath". too insulting? yeah, I guess. ummmm. dammit! I need a good comeback too, because I get so tired of that self-loving xtian bullshit! I hate it because I know inside their tiny minds, it makes them feel powerful because they feel they can control somebody else's lives by whispering to the air.
It's sad really.
OK, I have a christian scientist who keeps wanting to pray for my bad knee to heal. So not exactly your situation but even so, it is in the same ball park. Anyway, I always tell the guy: “if that will make you feel better about the situation, then feel free. It will not fix my permanent injury, though.”.
The same guy has other annoying behaviors too. One of them is to ask people “Who does the Holy Grail serve?” I have no clue what the answer that he is fishing for but I always come back with “How many does the Holy Grail serve?” You know how a box of some type of food always says something like “serves four” (assuming that three are not actually hungry usually)?
=
It depends on their tone. Most people just do it out of spite, a gimmick to get the last word out. However, there are many Christians, deluded as they may be, who really care about us and don't want us to burn in the eternal torture chamber that their omnibenevolent God set up for us (imagine that!). Overall, this doesn't bother me nearly as much as lots of other crap that they pull. I'd probably just say something like, "Thanks, but I don't think it'll help."
Our revels now are ended. These our actors, | As I foretold you, were all spirits, and | Are melted into air, into thin air; | And, like the baseless fabric of this vision, | The cloud-capped towers, the gorgeous palaces, | The solemn temples, the great globe itself, - Yea, all which it inherit, shall dissolve, | And, like this insubstantial pageant faded, | Leave not a rack behind. We are such stuff | As dreams are made on, and our little life | Is rounded with a sleep. - Shakespeare
Ask them how their other prayers worked out.
I'm usually a socially graceful person, so I just don't say anything. Literally. I pretend as if the statement never happened. If it's a situation where it would be appropriate to say something sarcastic, I say something like, "It's your life. Use it however you want."
I love coming up with ways to be dismissive while displaying tolerance.
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I once saw someone respond with:
Thanks, and I'll think for you.
I've used that response ever since. It's perfect.
Enlightened Atheist, Gaming God.
If they say it because I have suffered a misfortune and they are showing their empathy and sympathy at a time when both are needed or at least greatly appreciated, I say "thanks".
If they say it as a response to the discovery that I am an atheist and the "prayer" is designed in their mind to "convert" me (or simply advertise that no matter what was discussed they still feel superior in their ignorance) then I call them an arrogant and ignorant eejit and invite them to fuck off.
If neither of the above apply and the comment was made unthinkingly by someone who has simply been conditioned to express such platitudes then Vastet's advice above is perfect.
I would rather have a bottle in front of me than a frontal lobotomy
Well, since I live in a part of the world that isn't full of n00bs I've never had that happen to me. But I have always thought that if it did I would respond with "I'll think for you." It might be considered an insult by them but I see no reason why its more insulting than them praying for you.
I like to invoke the word of Pokemon to condescendingly dismiss things like that. Them: "I'll pray for you" Me: "and I'll catch as many pokemans as I can for you"
It works well when they want to 'talk to you about that man jesus' or 'about this great book, the bible' ( "I'd like to talk to you about pokemon and how they can make your life better' or if you haven't used a pokemon line on them before, then; 'no thanks, I'm not really into pokemon' )
When god gives you lemons you FIND A NEW GOD 1 Thessalonians 5:21
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You pray for me, I'll think for you because clearly you are not thinking for yourself.
"Very funny Scotty; now beam down our clothes."
VEGETARIAN: Ancient Hindu word for "lousy hunter"
If man was formed from dirt, why is there still dirt?
I think the Daniel Dennet response would be "Thanks. Will you also sacrifice a goat?"
I think we have a winner
Knowing what they think you really are, say you will pray to Satan for them.
Or mutter about Christians and their word magic.
Or "Don't bother. I'm meeting for a drink later."
Jews stole the land. The owners want it back. That is all anyone needs to know about Israel. That is all there is to know about Israel.
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If it's a cute girl: "I'll think about you too when I'm alone." <-- include a generous smile
If it's a dude: "I'll think about you too when I'm alone." <-- include a creepy smile
Logic is a systematic method of coming to the wrong conclusion with confidence.
If there was a God, who the fuck do you think you are that I would want or need you to speak to him on my behalf?
Based on the responses here I will go with a hybrid, "and I'll think for you, don't forget to sacrifice a goat!". I think if said properly, with a big fake smile, this will be gold.
"So far as I can remember, there is not one word in the Gospels in praise of intelligence." - Bertrand Russell
Stewie: Yay and God said to Abraham, "you will kill your son, Issak", and Abraham said, I can't hear you, you'll have to speak into the microphone." "Oh I'm sorry, Is this better? Check, check, check... Jerry, pull the high end out, I'm still getting some hiss back here."
Have you tried, "suck my balls"?
...
What? Too much?
Silly Will. Christians only do that in airport and rest stop restrooms.
Or in hotels after using mass quantities of cocaine.
Theism is why we can't have nice things.
*tear* it's ... so true!
Saint Will: no gyration without funkstification.
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