I don't want my own brother going to my wake because he wouldn't have the fucking respect to keep his mouth shut.

He even used our grandfather's funeral, who did believe, but didn't care that I didn't, my brother spoke at the funeral and lied and preached directly at me with at secret wink knowing I could not object in the moment. He made it about his beliefs and not our grandfather. I was so fucking pissed at him. He held me hostage instead of focusing on our grandfather.

Although I wouldn't be able to care after I am dead. I would request that if someone believes and does attend my wake, that they have the respect that if they bring up god belief, my atheist friends are going to want to challenge that and if they don't want their god beliefs challenged in the moment, then they should do whatever religious crap outside the venue.

I am so angry at what religion did to my brother's brain. He had drug and alcohol problems as a teen and stereotypically the snake oil salesmen convinced him that he needed a fictional super hero to make him behave himself.

I am by no means perfect in my life myself and as well did stupid shit when I was yonger. But whatever problems I had then, or have now, are not due to a magical cosmic comic book battle between good and evil.

But it really burns me when people kick someone out of their family merely because of a change of position. I am not bothered that my brother believes. My adoptive mom does and we get along fine. My brother however treats me like a lost puppy to save and treats everything like the end of the world when people disagree with him.

Our biological father pretty much abandon us and my mother could not afford to keep all 4 of us so she put me and my younger half sister up for adoption. That took guts and courage to do and I am better off because of it.

I have since met all of them. I have even spoken to my biological father because I found out he is suffering from testicular cancer. He apologized to me. I guess it was the least I could do considering. I am not angry about it anymore. Although we really have nothing in common.

My older sister is pretty much the only one I talk to much. She has depression problems and is pretty much a prisoner in her house because she cant hold down a job because of her mental issues. And she buys into all the right wing social crap that actually prevents society from giving her the help she needs.

My younger sister I think would have a relationship with me if it were not for her jealous fundy husband.

My biological family has had it much worse than I have. They all buy into the right wing crap of "god guns and bibles"and letting the pay gap explode and blame the left when they don't have what they need.

I am just as poor as they are but managed to escape all the social bullshit they buy into.

My adoptive mom and I are also politically and religiously opposite, but she doesn't take her religion seriously and even hates it like I do when other people try to thump her over the head. She does get defensive about critics of the republican party, that is more of an issue than religion.

My adoptive father died when I was 13. Both my mom and dad did buy into the authoritarian view of parenting and that "tough love" was the way to keep me in line. I cant fault them for that because like most people, when you think a pattern works you try to use it on others. Often what caused  conflict between my mother and I was she always took any questioning as defying her, when what even I didn't understand about myself isnt that I was defying her, but asking for clarification as to why I should do something, AND THEN, when she didn't give me a reason and dictated to me, then I did rebel.

ANYWHO, being 44 my relationship with my adoptive mother has gotten so much better. She is less scripted now and much more easy going although she still has her moments. Her toughness has rubbed off on me in a good way in some cases. It is why I don't take crap from theists here. It also has it's downside because I am super anal at work and drive people nuts during inspection time. That is good for the business, but it does drive people nuts.

I am sure that is way more detail than you asked for. I also like shiny objects.

 I don't mean to intrude Brian, but you sound like a pretty smart guy, why are you so broke dude?  You should be using your brain power to at the very least have a decent 'middle class' income.  I know that's dependent on a lot more factors than just IQ, but IQ is usually a good advantage.

 Hey, I'm not rich either, rich is a relative term.  I have read a few of your comments that indicated you were not so well off.  I just meant financially comfortable.  It's really not too difficult to earn enough to not have money as a constant concern, as for building riches, that's a different story and different sort of energy involved.  Again, I didn't mean to intrude, and I wasn't trying to tell you how to live your life.  It was just an observation.

Brian, Ktulu mentioned you are poor but is this something you have mentioned before or this is the first time in this thread?  How bad is it dude and what happened?  Only if you don't mind saying.

 Lol, Brain, relax, we're just curious that's all.  I'll back up.  Poor is a relative term, as long as you have a job, and no expensive addictions you aren't really bellow the poverty line.  I have a decent job, and my wife also works so while we're FAAAAR from rich, we're lucky enough to be comfortable.  The only reason I asked is because it sounded as though you were struggling from your previous posts.  My original question is, a guy with what I assume your IQ is should be able to go to college and easily get a diploma, therefore easily ensuring a decent pay.

 Ok, I stand correct it, I was intruding, my apologies. as long as you're happy and you're not hurting anyone, nothing else really matters.

The only thing that is intrusive on all of us is the pay gap and cost of living. Other than that if we both agree everyone should have an education you will still have people at the low end. So I think it is better to decrease the gap  and allow people to be happy with whatever they chose to do instead of insisting everyone follow the same script.

I am happy with very little and I am happy with my job. I just don't think the middle class and poor should be priced out of surviving which is what is going on increasingly at an alarming rate.

You look at other countries where you dont have the same extreme between the top and bottom, where you have better education and quality health care, they still have a low end, but they don't have the same lack of education or crime ratios we do here.

It isn't that you were "intruding" it was that you were being judgmental, even if you aren't aware of it. You are sold a script and all I am saying is if it all about being happy then we need to accept that what makes one person happy isn't the same as the next.

Sorry Brian, I was just wondering if there was something you had mentioned on the board in one of the other threads.  You and others have been here a lot longer than me so I didn't know if I had missed hearing something.

But as Ktulu said what is MOST important is you are happy with what you're doing. Nothing else matters!