5 excellent posts today Marty.  I sent them all out on twitter which gets reposted to facebook.  Hopefully some theists will come, even if they don't sign up for an account.

Study sexology. There are volumes written about it. It's well understood.

There's nothing mysterious about it. The main problems are how child's minds are shaped by their environment, the cultural and social pressures surrounding their own sexuality.

Children are born oblivious and naturally curious about their genitalia. This freaks out most parents.

Not too difficult to spot the problem...

If you want to know why they seem so interested and/or freaked out about sex, sexuality, and seem to want everyone to feel disgusted and ashamed of it I can offer a few different possible reasons. One of them is simply that it helps them maintain a patriarchal system. When sexuality is more open and frank and 'acceptable' so too then are contraceptives and the idea of a woman being her own person and being able to be in control of herself and her sexuality. In essence it becomes harder to control women and that is one big element I think. Another thing is this, guilt about sex is also key. Make teenagers who are already awkward, nervous, etc. about the changes going on feeling guilty about the thoughts that they're having they will try to get rid of the guilt and one easy way of doing that is in the various religious groups that will further codify the guilt and do what they can to exacerbate it, the guilt is also another good way to maintain the patriarchy. Another element has to do with helping spread the religion, they say that only married couples should have sex, this tends to push marriages quickly and/or the people involved are going to be likely turning to the church for support which will mean that the little tykes get indoctrinated. Part of it is also that ignorance is their friend, babies mean that people are less likely to be able to get a higher education and a good job which in turn helps keep them ignorant, dependent, and thus more likely to be part of a religious group.

 The most basic answer is that Religion has always reflected our social and economic order, it doesn't matter which religion, we all use the way that we see the world as a reference point for understanding (or trying to understand), the will of God. and historically, sex was a means to one of two ends. 

1: the production of workers/peasants

2: the consolidation of wealth. 

Because child rearing was so locked in to our natural economic order, it's only natural that the means of there production would be a very serious act that must not be preformed lightly. that is to say, it's only natural that the act of giving live be seen as something either sanctioned or condemned by God. Only (I would say) in the last century has marriage ceased to be purely a financial affair, and religion and religious people have been slow to catch up. 

What pisses me off is that when we agree with the obvious, not even that appeases morons with this mindset. I can and do agree that the safest way to avoid an unwanted pregnancy or disease is to not have sex.  You CAN END UP with a baby you don't want or cant afford, and you can catch something, even wearing a condom.

But these idiots who promote this want to make it magical and biblical, not pragmatic beyond political and religious labels.

I was a teen once and I can tell you any teen, male or female has raging hormones and no matter what you tell them the WILL take risks.  I look back at my sexual behavior and could have very easily, because I was young dumb and full of cum, could have ended up getting a girl pregnant. The best any parent can do EDUCATE THEM.

It is not evil to know how a penis or vagina work. It is not evil to know what kind of diseases you can contract with unprotected sex. It is not evil to use a condom. It is not evil to empower girls/women, into telling them they(not their partners, not their parents and not society) they own their body, no one else. Economic and health issues are good reasons to not have sex. But to make sex out to be religious or magical like the end of a romance movie is childish and absurd.

Hand masturbation is the safest way to have sex without oral, anal or vaginal sex. Oral sex counts. You cant make a baby, but you can catch something if the partner already has something.

The only thing you can do is raise the kid with knowledge. It is not enough to simply say "don't do that"

I labeled the two parts A and B. I will respond to each.
 

A. I am assuming you are regarding the mindset of Christians being upset with matters of sexuality. As a Christian Community we are definitely concerned with the deviations of sexual intercourse, however, placing the actions of fundamentalist groups as those from Westboro Baptist Church upon evangelical Christianity is unfair. They are definitely not considered Baptist or evangelical with their actions. Their actions do not reflect the gospel of Jesus Christ. The original poster of this thread talked about his years spent in the Fundamentalist Deep South, so his exposure to Fundamentalism has given him the idea that most Christians do not educate their children about sex and just forbid them to do it. However, that is a great concern for Christians (to be able to educate along the lines of the Bible, but also educate them on things such as condom use, etc.).I agree with the rest of your statement under letter “A.”

B. Most Christians are very aware of the factor of lust and hormones. However, just letting that continue without sound Biblical teaching to children would not be permissible for Christians. Of course, you believe that magic and the Bible is pretty much the same, but it’s not and Christians take heed the Bible because it is God’s revelation to us. You say that all parents can do is educate them, but Christians can educate AND also educate them according to the Bible and why holding off sexual intercourse until marriage is important.

Religion's main source of power comes from hijacking people's sexuality especially women's. When men use threats to control women's sexuality they are either rapists, pimps or pastors.

However, one thing I think the atheist community has failed to do is appeal to people with a natural inclination to be monogamous. We know that nature produced a very wide range of sexual orientations. From gay, bisexual, highly promiscuous, asexual and monogamous. If one is naturally inclined to be monogamous and desire a single long term partner, these people think they should be with the religious crowd, not the secular or atheist. If a young woman desires a husband that won't cheat on her, she is told to meet a 'good Christian man, non-believers are all promiscuous or gay'. Since the 'sexual purity' of religion appeals to many young women, men get pussy whipped into 'believing' because that's they only way they get any from these women.

I know myself, I was promiscuous for a time. Now, I just want to stay with one woman and not I'm not really interested in cheating. One of the problems we have is that I still have the habit of checking out women in public. Now if I want help to be a 'faithful' husband, the only help out there is all religious shit for my sexual sins. So if I want a happy marriage, the only way to have one is to ask magic sky daddy for help. I need to believe I'll be tortured for all eternity just for looking at an attractive woman and so will all the gays.

The Christians have hijacked monogamous marriage and convinced the public that the only way to be a good husband and father is with faith in the bible. Even though the authors and role models in the bible were either asexual(Jesus, Paul), highly promiscuous(Solomon, David, Abraham, etc...) or polygamists(Moses).

Shouldn't their be atheist groups for people committed to marriage and monogamy? Atheists for family values? Why not?

I think you misunderstood what I'm saying. Nature and some nurture decide one's sexual orientation for you. Because I'm heterosexual doesn't mean I'm against gays. But you know birds of a feather want to flock together, so I really don't have any interest in hanging out with homosexuals socially and they probably don't have much interest in me. Same with guys that want to pick up lots of chicks.

So where does an atheist that is interested in having a happy marriage and family turn to be with like minded people? Religion has pretty much hijacked family values and monogamy. I'm just saying shouldn't all atheists want to end the hijacking marriage and family values regardless of their orientation? How can atheism be seen as an option for those oriented toward heterosexual monogamy?

I have over the years been married three times.
My first wife and I were together for 11 years, and we had one son, my eldest. She developed schizophrenia, and the marriage became untenable.

My second was perhaps a mistake from the onset, I married my girlfriend because she had medical issues and I had insurance through my job, not the best reason. But we none the less stayed together for almost 13 years, and had a daughter together, my baby, now 19 and in University. The marriage ended after we drifted apart emotionally. No hatred, no rancor just no love left.

My third marriage has been going on now for 13 years, and all's well, we are happy.

She has two kids biologically and we have adopted 8 children, and one foster daughter. Total kids, 13 with 36 grand kids.

I'm not claiming expertise, but I think I can call myself experienced in family and marriage.

3 or 4 of my kids are Atheists, outright. Some are into their native (first nations) spirituality, my youngest who stayed with her Mom is catholic and the rest are for the most part, irreligious.

My take on religion and sexuality tends to follow the sex as control idea...
If you can dictate what is a basic human action, control it, instill guilt and no small amount of paranoia by it, you literally and figuratively have your people by the balls.
I agree with the OP, no one protests Red Lobster even though eating shellfish is listed as an abomination in the same book that gives that appellation to gays.
And even though it's absurd to contemplate that a cosmic being, capable of conceptualizing and creating the entire universe cares what a hairless ape does with its genitalia, a lot of people think just that.
The bible is silent on the issue of abortion except for suggesting a fine to be paid to the husband if a man causes a woman to miscarry.
The Bible doesn't have problems with polygamy, scores of patriarchal concubines, selling ones daughters into slavery, glosses over patriarchal incest, rape of captured virgins etc... yet NOTHING gets a fudamentalist as wigged out as someone elses sexuality...

LC >;-}>

Sorry for the ramble.