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Dumb Ass Criminals
Posted on: February 14, 2013 - 8:04pm
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Dumb Ass Criminals
I learned how to drive a stick-shift when I was seven. What a fucking moron. www.wesh.com/news/central-florida/orange-county/Police-Carjacker-who-couldn-t-drive-stick-shift-arrested/-/12978032/18547550/-/14582odz/-/index.html
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Actually the stick shift is funny, but also steeling the cell phone with a GPS was even more stupid. I am glad most criminals are this stupid, it makes them easier to catch. I worry more about people like Maddoff, he did far more damage to society than this petty jackass.
I love stupid criminal stories. I've heard once where a guy will rob a store, but go in before and write a check, then go back in later to rob it. I caught a story about a guy who robbed a deli ran around the corner and jumped into the trunk of a car to hide from police, but he jumped into the trunk of an unmarked police car.
Oh and another idiot walked into a police station to report his cocaine stolen. You have to imagine what is going on in the officer's head when they hear that, "Excuse me, I'll be back in a second"........goes around the corner out of view to other officers........"You wont believe what that dumb ass out there just reported"...........goes back......."Thanks for reporting that, can I interest you in some nice shiny bracelets"
"We are a nation of Christians and Muslims, Jews and Hindus -- and nonbelievers."Obama
Check out my poetry here on Rational Responders Like my poetry thread on Facebook under Brian James Rational Poet, @Brianrrs37 on Twitter and my blog at www.brianjamesrationalpoet.blog
There was a guy in my hometown that got into it with his boss and got fired. It was one of those sandwich places like Subway. Anyway, he decided to break into the place after hours and rob it.
While emptying out the cash registers, he decided that he would cook himself one of those sandwiches the place was known for.
He set the place on fire because he did not know how to work the stoves properly and then decided to call the fire department.
Not a good idea. He tried to claim that he saw a robbery in progress, tried to stop it, and FOUND the place on fire.
It took the New Jersey police department all of 5 seconds to figure it out.
“It is proof of a base and low mind for one to wish to think with the masses or majority, merely because the majority is the majority. Truth does not change because it is, or is not, believed by a majority of the people.”
― Giordano Bruno
He probably got a shorter sentence for calling the FD, probably the smartest part of his whole escapade lol.
When I was a kid I read a news story about a guy in Edmonton calling the cops because of gremlins. Cops showed up, found drugs.
Friend told me about him and a buddy being out late when they were teens. Buddy's buddy decides to chain a cop car to a street light. Funny. He should have looked in the car first. Cop waited until the lock clicked then scared the guy so bad he pissed himself. Wish I'd been there.
Enlightened Atheist, Gaming God.
It is funny but sucks at the same time because I am sure the place had to be closed a couple days maybe weeks and workers lost hours and the owner lost money.(Don't read my sympathy for the owner Beyond, I am a commie and hate private business)
"We are a nation of Christians and Muslims, Jews and Hindus -- and nonbelievers."Obama
Check out my poetry here on Rational Responders Like my poetry thread on Facebook under Brian James Rational Poet, @Brianrrs37 on Twitter and my blog at www.brianjamesrationalpoet.blog
We do a regular bit every week on UnLearn TV called the Minimal Criminal, in which we showcase the week's dumbest law breakers:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g0D4NPpx_Ss&list=PLHJHFUYG52h6N0Px4_PAOEPPj1CVyiQIw
www.RichWoodsBlog.com
What where the couple watching porn? "Hey is that Candy Samples? Go ahead call the police, mind if I squeeze one off?"
"We are a nation of Christians and Muslims, Jews and Hindus -- and nonbelievers."Obama
Check out my poetry here on Rational Responders Like my poetry thread on Facebook under Brian James Rational Poet, @Brianrrs37 on Twitter and my blog at www.brianjamesrationalpoet.blog
Yeah I posted this a while back. Strange people. Must have been sniffing those bath salts.