Politician Poling
Category: News and Politics

Samuel Thomas Poling, Blog 126, Politician Poling

This blog will be divided into sections using dashed lines.
The first is an introduction.
The second is me as I would be on a campaign.
The third is me as I would be a Senator.
The fourth is me as I would be a President.
And the fifth is a conclusion.

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Introduction

My dream. Maybe unlikely, but thinking that way won't do anyone any good.

As it stands now I'll probably be going into law soon. Defense Paralegal leading into Defense Attorney. Then after that I'll stop defending the law and start working on it as a politician. Senator seems to be my dream job. I'd also love to be president.

However, I am 18, and I have a lot of aging and maturing to do before I am even the age requirement. But hey, I'm already a white male; at least I'm that far. ...That was a joke. ...Never mind.

I do have a clean record. No breaking of the law. Never took drugs. Never drank a drop of alcohol. Never hit one cigarette, even though I probably don't need to appeal that far into my cleanliness. Hell, I haven't even had sex yet. The social rituals of flirting are wastes of my precious time. My parents never divorced, there is no crime or drugs or alcoholics in my family... I'm pretty damn clean. No dirt to dig up on me or mine. Yet. Hopefully it'll stay that way. It should. I have zero need to break the law, and zero want to alter my mind with any chemicals or drugs or drinks. If I do not have my state of mind, I have nothing, for I not even am. I even fear sleeping for it is a time when consciousness is altered. I also fear pain meds unless they're absolutely necessary, for the same reason. I really love my mind.

But albeit my history is and should remain untarnished, my family does have its other quirks. We tend to... Piss people off...
I'm a direct line down from King Poling of the Poling Castle in none other than Poland. All I know is he pissed someone off. Also my family is easily traced back to a particularly high ranking Templar Knight, who pissed someone off and kinda lost his Templar...ness. Which is good, because the Templars were evil bastards. I like to hope that's why he got mad at the rest of them. Then we were very high ranking in the Free Masons in England, or whatever the group was called back then. My father was even visited by some... People from the group offering... Something... Freaky Free Masons. I was suppose to be visited by them too when I "came of age," but I guess my dad pissed them off. Anyways, the older Poling in the Free Masons had a shot at a huge position of power, but he, of course, pissed them all off with a rant on something or another.

Even Poling's I don't even know if I have connection to I hear about being assholes in history. So anyways, that's kinda in my blood. We never really get too high before everyone hates us. Or, alternatively, we hate everyone else.

Also, my particular close family, although very stereotypical American-Dreamish (aside from the fact everything and anything we say is an argument in this house hold), has very little money and connections. I'm dry. I am dry. No money, no connections, nothing. Nothing. I have to work from the bottom up. I don't even have a license yet.

But whatever. This blog is about what I would be like if I was a politician. Here it goes.

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The Campaign Trail

I'd undoubtedly be myself.
I cannot stand politicians. I cannot stand their ads; I cannot stand their speeches, their conferences, their decisions, their lies, their information, their procedures... I hate it. And I hate it all.

I would not put on the vote suckering smile when I have a job to do. I will not speak phlegmatically, inoffensively, when something needs to be said, needs to be heard, and needs to be bashed. I will not "approve this add" if it's a load of emotionally manipulative bullshit. Nor will I ride tractors or hold babies to appeal for move votes from the shallow. No. The answer is no. I do not, I never did, and I never will approve that add.

If I add on television, I'll add with complete honesty, and say the most necessary things needed to be said, and show the most necessary things needed to be shown. And if it's an issue the election is focused around, I will not grin and quip. I will be as serious as the issue, and the people working on the issue, ought to be.

As for my speeches, they'll be somewhat like my blogs here. Probably matured, because I'll be older and not so much a crazed teen anymore, but still. I am a seed of my future self, and these blogs therefore are seeds of my future speeches. I will tell it how it is, and anyone or anything that asserts otherwise will find themselves victims of their own stupidity, under the might of my reason. They'll be offended, but that's only natural. I didn't make them offended, they'll choose to be. No one wants to be wrong, ergo, if you prove someone wrong well enough, they will whine and cry, kick and scream, bitch and moan about it. If they don't, then you didn't do a good enough job proving them wrong. A person better be defeated enough to decide to feel offended.

And, of course, the average humans, being the complete idiots that they are, will not look at this in favor. Why? Because they want the cold, emotionless, smiling, child holding, phlegmatic speaking, inoffensive, professional appearing suit to stand before them. And so long as this is what they want, democracy will fail. For all the honest men will not be elected. Only those who'll do anything for more votes. Sorry, that's logically how democracy ends up, unless you are very good at convincing a public to uphold a sense of responsibility. Which, of course, would be my only hope.

But I tell you right now that I would soon rather lose any election and never do any good in politics, than change a single sentiment of my heart for a vote. I would toss aside votes to uphold my true image, as I truly am. I will not alter my positions, nor mitigate the illogical and immoral crimes of my opponents to make myself seem more charming. I will not pull any punches so someone might be able to live on thinking that a crappy idea holds any merit at all. Not one detail of myself would I change for any number of votes.

I will tell it how it is. And I will be passionate.
I will use reason first, of course. Reason is the stirring wheel. You must direct yourself to the appropriate goal. However, it won't do you any good unless you have the gas pedal of passion. You need both reason and emotion to be successful at anything. Logic without courage is beautiful, perfect car... Out of gas in the middle of the desert. Passion and courage without logic is a wild and rampant dangerous beast. You need both.

However I doubt, even if I say that metaphor, which the public will be so accepting toward my emotional stance on some issues. But that won't stop me. I want no vote for shallow reasons, not one. They'll say I'm too rude, that I care too much. Naw, I'll say that I don't care enough. That I'm not angry enough - and more. I'll say that I am disgusted at anyone who isn't pissed off at least as much as I am. If a civil liberty is attack, the only possible emotion response of any responsibility would be anger. I would be disgusted of myself if I did not feel anger. If I did not show anger. I am already disgusted at my self, for I still do not feel enough.

If you believe there is a problem with honesty, if there is a problem with appropriately applying emotion to get strength behind your bullets of logic... Then don't vote for me.
Please, for the love of everything good on this earth, don't vote for me. I want no support from the shallow. Not one vote. I want no one who thinks that honesty is a crime to support me in any way, shape, or form. Don't vote for me. Don't say anything nice about me. Don't even consider my name on the ballot. For you will insult me. As I said, I will not condone stupidity. I can and will sooner forfeit my political race before I play any part in the level of human fallibility.

I am not that politician. If you want that God damn politician, you can look elsewhere. If you want someone to smooth off the edges of reality for you, don't look to me. If what you seek is a smile to control your fate, your neighbor's fate, and the fate of your children, rather than honesty, truth, and reason... Then my name is not the one you desire to mark.

This is important to me. Maybe you think the deal I make this into is far too big. But that's how I see it. Deal with it.
To no form of error will I pull a single punch.
I sincerely detest error. It will never be upheld, and I will always be destroyed.

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Senator

Well, Senator or Congressman. Whichever, this works for both.

I have been a part of my student congress. I, alone, stood up to appose a horrible act he school was trying to pass (as I'm about to do again, see a later blog). Everyone there just went to get out of class and have some doenuts. I want there for the interest of the class I was representing. Which happened to be NJROTC, Naval Junior Reserve Officer Training Corp. I was a fourth year. Booya. Anyways... They didn't even give us time to debate it. They didn't even give us to bring the issue up with the classrooms, whose opinions we were suppose to be REPRESENTING. Can you say BULLSHIT? The Marysville school board sure was.

It was an act to force payment on retakes of classes.
The entire vote of our council counted as one vote on the board.
And I was determined to make sure it was a vote against.

However, they just wanted to get on with it for the doenuts at the end, and chit chat with their friends. They'd pass anything. They did pass anything. They'd all go "aye" and move on. You know how it is.

The adult congress in Washington was very much like this, admittingly. For example with the Patriot Act. So many of them now are speaking against it, apologizing for being the way they were. Yes, what the congress of my school does is often what the congress of the US does. And I hate it. Very, very much.

So you can image what I did. They read the resolve, and asked for the vote, monotone as usual. I said "OBJECTION! I, Samuel Thomas Poling, move for discussion." (That's the procedure we have to say things, so they can record who said what. Even though no one but I and a few others do follow this procedure.) Unfortunately, I needed it to be seconded. Everyone was already sighing at me. Whispering, "Hey, dude, chill," and shit.

However, Cody Stich, I believe it was, a popular actor at the school, and my friend (I directed several video productions videos he acted in, and you can even see one on my MySpace page, Hey You Good Ones. He's the one I fight in the video), stood up and said, "I, Cody Stich, second that motion." People who work with me for a while actually do respect me, once they come to terms with my asshole abrasiveness. Cody knows I'm an asshole, but he also knows I know what I'm doing.

So then the speaker goes, "Alright, you go first, Sam, what's your discussion?"

"This cannot be passed, we haven't even heard of it before, or gotten a decent description!"

He then reads the description. Students who fail a class twice must pay so and such amount of money to take it again.

Me: "Even in required courses?"
Speaker: "Yes."
Me: "It doesn't matter, we can't pass this, and we have to talk it over with our classes before we can represent them in a vote!"

By now all the other students are moaning and throwing paper at me... So I turn on them.
Me: "This isn't important, is that what you're saying? This could lead to an increased drop out rate! If we aren't careful, we could be ruining the LIVES of God knows how many generations of students! Not that you care, you think getting your precious pastries a second sooner isn't worth a second of consideration of a person's future."
Speaker: "That's enough. Any further discussion?"
Me: "What?! Yeah, further discussion, we need to talk to the classes!"
Speaker: "They said we don't have time to do that."
Me: "We need time to do that and to hold an appropriate debate!"
Speaker: "We aren't supposed to debate, just vote on it."
Me: "How can we vote if we haven't heard both sides?!"

Everyone gets noisy and starts yelling at me, yatta yatta yatta. Cody is trying to help me out... But it's chaos.

Speaker: "All those in favor?"
Everyone: "Aye."
Speaker: "All those against?"
Me and probably Cody: "Nay."
People snicker at the lack of Nays.

Fortunately I complained to some department heads, and so did some instructors who heard what I said in the meeting and the bill went down in flames. Which sucks, because it might have been a great bill! All I wanted was appropriate discussion, debate, and to ask those who are really deciding, the rest of the student body. The stupid school board must just be like those students in the congress, and like the politicians in the US congress. They. Don't. Care. They just want their damn doenuts at the end.

But anyways, I believe that illustrates how I'd be in the Legislative Branch.

I image everyone would go, "Oh, great, Poling is objecting AGAIN." I'd make plenty of enemies, but as all my friends have said, "At first I thought you were annoying, but then I realized what you were saying was totally correct. I'm surprised someone like you even managed to exist!" So I hope I'd make some wise allies there as well as spiteful opponents.

If there aren't any cameras during a discussion or a vote, I'd get angry. "Where the hell are the cameras?"
"Well, this is a closed hearing."
"...Why?"
"Because... uh..."
"We're making a law for the people. The people have the right and, hell, they have the duty to see the process and the reasoning. Go get some cameras. Now."
"Poling, you can't just do that; it's always been this way."
"Incomplete statement. It's always been this way... Until now. Now get off your ass and fetch the media. They have a job to do and so do we. Let's get to it."
"No!"
"What are you afraid of? Do you believe this conference will have something to hide? We're LEGISLATING LAW over this land and its people. You shall have nothing to hide, and you will hide nothing. They will hear everything. They will see everything. And if there is something wrong, they'll attack you on it. If you're afraid of that, great. You should be. It'll make you double check your reasoning and surrender personal agenda. NOW GET SOME DAMN CAMERAS IN HERE NOW."

That would be such a rush... The best feeling is the world, destroying error... Righting wrongs... Oh, damn, just thinking about it is orgasmic. I could get high. Maybe righting wrongs should be considered a recreational drug.

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President

And now for what I'd probably be like as Mister President Poling.

First off, I'll be honest... One I won't be in the Senate, I probably won't get many chances to attack bad law, save for the VETO. Oh, precious VETO. As I'm being honest, I am obligated to say that I'd probably beat that stamp dry. I cannot see anything wrong with challenging law if I can think of one shred of reasonable doubt against it. VETO. VETO. VETO.

And I'll go into the senate and the house as often as I could. And make arguments and so forth. Get them to start legalizing things that shouldn't be illegal, like drugs, prostitution, and polygamy. Things that do not hurt others, things that are personal choices and that others do not have the right to make for them.

I'll surely put the old "The Buck Stops Here," sign on my desk. ...On my door. ...On my job description... Replace my middle name with it, so I'll be Mister President Samuel The-Buck-Stops-Here Poling... I'll slap it on my T-Shirt... You get the picture.

Appealing back to what I said in the campaign section, I wouldn't do cutsey appealing to the shallow public crap. I won't hold types of squash with farmers in India, nor play on instruments in China, not even get photo ops in jump suits near helicopters. No, no, no, the answer is no. Even if I normally WOULD play around on the instruments, or talk to the farmers with the crops, I'd either shun the cameras, or avoid that action. I just want to do all I can to avoid all risk of having any shallow human support me in politics in anyway. I'm honestly paranoid to death of it. ONE idiot would discourage me if they supported me. The more idiots and the more they support me, the more... Filthy... I'd feel. I will not become what I despite, nor take part in the error of which I hate.

I will definitely start the fire side chats again. And I'll do them weekly, or biweekly. Maybe five times a week, or every day! I'm not sure; I do not know how busy I'd be with other forms of communication with the people.
But communication with the American Public would be my most frequent activity. Fireside chat or speech, or conference...
I would always put them first. No prime minister. No ruler. No saint, no GOD would be scheduled over the people. No, I will not schedule my meetings with the people around my meetings with other leaders. I'll schedule, strictly, my meetings with other leaders around my meetings with the people. If they find that offensive they can just go fuck themselves. To put it bluntly.

I am the servant of the people. Nothing more, nothing less. I am the greatest position of service one man can hold. They are my primary duty, them. They're opinions. I am a representation, an embodiment of their views. If they are not my focus, then I am cracked. I am a useless tyrant. And there is nothing that I would hate more to become. I would soon rather have all the shallow support me, and be a fool myself, than to become a tyrant. Of course, being a fool would likely lead to me becoming some for of tyrannical, but you get my point. Tyranny under my name is my greatest personal fear. I will not, and would not have it. A president is a servant. A servant.

I will speak with them in speeches in fireside chats, about all my choices, all my Vetoes, all my international conflicts. I will describe for them, in the most sincere detail, what the situation is, and I will explain my reasoning. I will explain other possible solutions, but also elaborate on why I chose mine over them. And I will ask them for their aid, if they see something I overlooked, or realize a mistake that I made. Because politician's make mistakes, good or bad. I am one man. And as one, no matter who I am, I have a certain likelihood of being in error. I hope to minimize that with my skepticism I'm known for, but I still error.

The only solution is to not be one man. And to become more I must appeal to my masters, the people. All parties, constantly.
I won't believe the majority of opinions simply because they are the majority, however. I will weight it with reason, and the best reasoning of the people will rule my choices that I make on their behalf.

I would never start a draft. I doubt I'd be in a war, because, believe it or not, I believe it very likely I can avoid such conflict. I am not an asshole all the time; I actually do have a very good way to turn enemies into friends. I just appeal to their circumstances, be completely honest and sincere, and explain to them I only want what is the best for everyone. Being sincere would be no problem, for deep down it is born from my hate of falsehood. As strongly as I hate falsehood is as strongly as I'll be honest.

But I'll never have a draft if I am in war. No way. In my opinion that is the most evil political move imaginable. People have the choice. In any country that can call itself free, they have the choice. If not enough volunteers do volunteer, then I guess we lose. But that'd be the choice of the democracy, then, wouldn't it?
The draft is the complete perfect opposite of freedom, democracy, logic, dignity, and everything good. NO. DRAFT.
NO one will be forced to kill against their will if I be in the house, the senate, or president chair. Ever. Not on my watch. Period.

I would not be afraid to go to war if I had to, however. I'm usually antiwar, because I believe it has to be the most definite choice you ever have to make in your life. For me to put in my support for a war, the necessity of it would have to be so proven, 1+1=2 would be envious. Well, not that much. About equal level as 1+1=2's proof.

What reasons would I go to war? Liberty and safety, what else?
I'm still working through exactly all my foreign politics theories, and what is and isn't a good move... yatta, yatta, yatta, but I know it'll stem from my core value of political truth.

"Everyone has the right to anything, so long as it does not directly impede the rights of others. Your liberty ends only where another's liberty beings. You may not force anything on or from someone unless it is direct, necessary, and appropriate counterforce of them forcing something on you."

That's my political law, which I believe could, and should, be able to replace the entire constitution. Probably I'd just want it added in, but if actually followed, this code will still uphold everything the constitution does.

I'd apply it strongly to whether or not to go to war.
If a tyrant is in power, he has no right to break that code of law. I have the right to stop him, if so asked by his people.
Yet I have to be extremely careful... I can't just go around the world and replace all leaders... Even though technically I should, if I must, when I must... If so desired by the countries people...
It's complicated. This is why I don't like foreign politics. I'll rack my brain on it some more and write a blog about it all later.

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Conclusion

That'd be about what I'd be like as a politician. It's my dream, my life's goal, my everything. It be the only thing that'd satisfy me, and the only thing that brings me true joy. For I cannot be satisfied until at least all the obvious major political wrongs

I'm only 18 now. I hope as a 30 year old I'll see a sure path of success. Right now, however, I haven't a very good clue at all on how I'll be arriving at my desired destination.

But where there's a will...
Let's just see if I don't piss too many people off first.

Samuel Thomas Poling, Blog 126, Politician Poling