Kansas Outlaws Practice Of Evolution
Posted on: September 2, 2008 - 11:37am
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Kansas Outlaws Practice Of Evolution
Kansas Outlaws Practice Of Evolution
"TOPEKA, KS – In response to a Nov. 7 referendum, Kansas lawmakers passed emergency legislation outlawing evolution, the highly controversial process responsible for the development and diversity of species and the continued survival of all life."
"Anyone can repress a woman, but you need 'dictated' scriptures to feel you're really right in repressing her. In the same way, homophobes thrive everywhere. But you must feel you've got scripture on your side to come up with the tedious 'Adam and Eve not Adam and Steve' style arguments instead of just recognising that some people are different." - Douglas Murray
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The onion!
It's september 2nd, not april 1st.
That's hilarious
Especially this:
"No species is exempt," said Marcus Holloway, a state police spokesman. "Whether you're a human being or a fruit fly—if we detect one homologous chromosome trying to cross over during the process of meiosis, you will be punished to the full extent of the law."
The Onion touches me,
to the depths of my sou...
aww hell,
right in me funny bone.
I had to write something for my 400th post so why not this!
"Very funny Scotty; now beam down our clothes."
VEGETARIAN: Ancient Hindu word for "lousy hunter"
If man was formed from dirt, why is there still dirt?
...given my home state's past history with evolution, I wouldn't be at all surprised to see something like this happen for real. It's terrifying sometimes to realize that I share my home state with the likes of Fred Phelps, Sam Brownback, etc.
Conor
Finally! someone is doing something about the evil that is called evolution!
I was a fraction of a centimetre from banging my head against the wall when the link came up as the Onion. It is sad when a fake and humourous news story so closely resembles recent history.
Enlightened Atheist, Gaming God.
When I saw the thread title I was extremely worried.
Poe's law is scary stuff, isn't it?
The Onion has it in for Kansas:
Evangelical Scientists Refute Gravity With New 'Intelligent Falling' Theory
KANSAS CITY, KS—As the debate over the teaching of evolution in public schools continues, a new controversy over the science curriculum arose Monday in this embattled Midwestern state. Scientists from the Evangelical Center For Faith-Based Reasoning are now asserting that the long-held "theory of gravity" is flawed, and they have responded to it with a new theory of Intelligent Falling.
Full Story
I would rather have a bottle in front of me than a frontal lobotomy
fuck kansas. i'd rather go to nebraska. at least nebraska has a badass springsteen album named after it.
"I have never felt comfortable around people who talk about their feelings for Jesus, or any other deity for that matter, because they are usually none too bright. . . . Or maybe 'stupid' is a better way of saying it; but I have never seen much point in getting heavy with either stupid people or Jesus freaks, just as long as they don't bother me. In a world as weird and cruel as this one we have made for ourselves, I figure anybody who can find peace and personal happiness without ripping off somebody else deserves to be left alone. They will not inherit the earth, but then neither will I. . . . And I have learned to live, as it were, with the idea that I will never find peace and happiness, either. But as long as I know there's a pretty good chance I can get my hands on either one of them every once in a while, I do the best I can between high spots."
--Hunter S. Thompson