You know, I wouldn't call this "typical".  This is Colbert Threatdown material.  I could seriously see him following this up by screaming "Bears!" and throwing up that one graphic of the roaring Grisley.

I saw this news article as being very tongue in cheek.  Informing people of what those who claim themselves in real life to be vampires are actually like, but other than that just poking fun at the whole idea.  I don't see what the big deal is about this news story.  I think people need to flick that little switch titled "sense of humour" and watch it again.

Um I hope that you are aware that he is not talking about the Count Dracula type of vampire who would burst into flame just for talking a walk on a sunny day, right?

He is talking about the people who are into a fake “vampire culture” that developed in response to one particular RPG (Vampire: The Masquerade). The whole bit about doctors and lawyers being vampires is quite over the top. In reality, we are talking about the Goth crap that some teenagers have going on.

Actually, I have known a few of those from my days working crowd control at sci-fi conventions. They refuse to emerge from the hotel room while the sun is out. They keep a friend around who is willing to pretend to be the person whom they feed from. I have personally videotaped the feeders bringing bags from McDonald's into the hotel room around lunch time.

Furthering the matter of the reality of fake vampires, I assure you that it is impossible to drink more than a shot glass of human blood. While some of the fake vampires may do that much, the human digestive system will reject much more than that as it produces a reaction that normally comes into play for massive internal bleeding. If you bleed into your stomach, you will vomit the blood out to keep the digestive juices from getting into your system in general. And the vomit will be partially digested blood that ends up looking like coffee grounds.

Actually, this serves as evidence of the fact the the old 1980's stories of ritual abuse were fake. Real cases of abuse would have reported evidence that conformed to actual fact. Nobody reported that drinking blood was followed by puking coffee grounds. Nor did reports of human sacrifice ever refer to the “blue worms” that came from the human gut (intestines are really blue).

Uh. Well, he references Stoker's work as a preface to the 'investigation', the interviewee plainly stated (without being ridiculed) that she thought she was a vampire and researching legitimate vampires, and Sannity said at the conclusion that it was 'mysterious' and 'intriguing', which implies the notion that it's not totally superstitious bullshit.

What the Fuck?

*facepalm*

[/life]

Lions aren't humans.

Techincally they would be undead humans - unless they're a vampire dwarf for example.

That template is wimpy as hell though, it needs a lower level adjustment. Maybe that is what Hannity is complaining about.

While that is entirely true... my mind jumped to the thought of... "How the hell does a vampire dwarf manage to bite my neck?"... but i guess knee caps work to.

I'm guessing animal blood may be digestible while human blood is not - otherwise people could never have eaten raw meat. Can cannibals eat raw human meat without getting sick?

Meat is meat and blood is blood.  Your digestive system isn't equipped notice any difference based upon the species.  Freshly killed and hygenically prepared raw meat shouldn't be a problem unless the animal was carrying a pathogen itself.  

Which becomes a very interesting problem when you decide to eat your own species...