Impossible things christians believe: Please add to the list.
Posted on: November 23, 2009 - 7:45pm
Offline
Impossible things christians believe: Please add to the list.
* Unassisted pre-1969 space travel
* Mental telepathy
* Demon possession
* Zombies
* Angels
* Devils
* Ghosts
* Invisible men
* Flying people
* Mind reading
* Talking animals
* Magic food
* Spontaneous combustion
* Mind control
* Voices
* Time travel
* Evil curses
* Eternal life
* Visions
* Sex with angels
* Weather control
* Moral purity of virgins
* Blood sacrifice
* Cannibalism
* Monsters
* Stars going out in defiance of their life cycle
* Stars that go out and reappear
* Stars falling from space to earth
* Stars appearing out of nowhere
* Vegetarian carnivores
* Spiritual possession of all human life by either god or satan
"Experiments are the only means of knowledge at our disposal. The rest is poetry, imagination." Max Planck
- Login to post comments
What the hell am I doing wrong with my pastes? I do that every time...
Alchemy comes to mind.
Do you use notepad as an editor? If not, try it and see what happens. It looks like you're posting from msword or something.
Enlightened Atheist, Gaming God.
Thanks for the tip...
Look at the text editor here, and use the "paste from word" button. It's the third clipboard picture and has a little "w" on it.
Vote for Democrats to save us all from the anti-American Republican party!
Please become a Patron of Brian Sapient
-Worldwide flood appearing from nowhere and going away.
-Humans and animals surviving on a planet with enough water to flood it.
-Ancient people living hundreds of years.
-Human parthenogenesis.
-Water turning into blood. (I wonder what blood type it was)
"I am an atheist, thank God." -Oriana Fallaci
* Creation
Can somebody explain the time travel and space travel?
The devil fell from heaven to earth - through space - so that was the space travel part. Maybe I could add base jumping from space with no parachute.
Time travel I put in because it's a cool thing and if there was a god he could travel through time if he wanted, so christians have to believe it's possible.
"Experiments are the only means of knowledge at our disposal. The rest is poetry, imagination." Max Planck
Maybe not time travel.
That a being more powerful than anything imaginable has nothing better to do than reading their every thought and will give them eternal bliss or suffering based on what they do in 70 odd years of life.
That even though there are thousands of gods, they picked the only correct one, and more so, picked the correct sect of that religion. Ie, fundies might say liberal xtians and catholics won't go to heaven, or mormons say no other xtians will get in. Guess they must be pretty lucky to get born not only into the one true religion, but the one true interpertation of it too..
Psalm 14:1 "the fool hath said in his heart there is a God"-From a 1763 misprinted edition of the bible
Argument from Sadism: Theist presents argument in a wall of text with no punctuation and wrong spelling. Atheist cannot read and is forced to concede.
Maybe not time travel but there is a part of the bible where time stands still..so that must kinda count right? Maybe put time/space manipulation.
Psalm 14:1 "the fool hath said in his heart there is a God"-From a 1763 misprinted edition of the bible
Argument from Sadism: Theist presents argument in a wall of text with no punctuation and wrong spelling. Atheist cannot read and is forced to concede.
The idea that the nastiest serial killer can pray while the lethal injection is working down the IV line and get a guaranteed ticket to heaven. However, someone who spent their entire life working to make the world a better place yest did not do the one tiny thing that forces god to issue the ticket is screwed for eternity.
=
Umm... everything in the Bible.
That you can say that the Bible is 100% from God but it's OK to ignore the bad bits.
That morals come from the Bible.
That it makes sense to say that we can't fathom God's will and then go around telling everyone what he doesn't like.
Zen-atheist wielding Occam's katana.
Jesus said, "Suppose ye that I am come to give peace on earth? I tell you, Nay; but rather division." - Luke 12:51
There seem to be many non-xtians believing in part of this list too.
mental telepathy, mind reading
Demon possessions seems to occur in many religions
angels, devils and ghosts too
Invisible men, talking animals and flying people are very popular themes in modern movies and other kinds of media. 'Invisible man', 'Superman', 'Dr Doolittle'. Besides time travel, evil curses, visions.
Is it not a song that says 'I'm gonna make it to heaven' and 'I will live forever'?
Is there a big difference between 3 000 000 000 years and eternity? Live has lasted quite long.
And why are cannibalism and blood sacrifices impossible?
I do not know about stars, only that xtians tend to say that stars sometimes are symbol for angels.
Did you see the teeth of the giant panda or the fruit bat? Those are vegetarian carnivores according to biologists.
Of course, there are many things written in the bible that have never been proven by science. I think that this is a common thing among religions, myths and fairy tales.
What do you think of extra terrestrial life? that is a wide spread believe among evolutionists.
Actually, it has been shown that the Earth's crust contains enough water to fill the oceans more than once.
I had an active atheistic professor at my university who believed in human parthenogenesis. It was even no problem for him that this could only lead to a daughter (two X-chromosomes). A small mutation was enough to change the sex into male - according to this teacher.
"That it makes sense to say that we can't fathom God's will and then go around telling everyone what he doesn't like" - good one
Impossible might be that we can change the state of dead people by praying for them.
That some group of people democratically chooses the new impersonification of Jesus/Peter when the previous pope dies.
That the creation story can be interpreted as evolution is very impossible. Richard Dawkins knows all about it.
Revolutionistic ideas always bring division.
I'm a newcomer, from Spain, but... all of you guys have forgotten the worst of the catholic unbelievable lies:
A WORLD WITH ONLY JUST ONE WOMAN????
How is that even possible? How can they dare to say that was paradise?
Not wanting to be genre favouritism... Ladies, don't you think that paradise isn't a one-only-man place?
If my english is not quite good, forgive me, it's not my mother languaje, neither my second one... so...
I find this hard to believe but I'd love to read something factual about it.
Either way we're talking about world wide flood with all land masses and mountain ranges below water. We'd need roughly 10x the H2O we currently have on Earth to do that. And if we had that much water Earth's atmosphere would be about as hot and dense as the one on Venus.
"I am an atheist, thank God." -Oriana Fallaci
Your point is perfectly clear. I agree. Paradise for me would involve many more girls than eve wandering around. There'd be a lot of fast machines and heaps of cool watches. And the surround sound would be unbelievable.
Paradise is such a personal thing.
"Experiments are the only means of knowledge at our disposal. The rest is poetry, imagination." Max Planck
how about the resurrection
I guess this is why Islam is outgrowing christianity.
"I am an atheist, thank God." -Oriana Fallaci
The last study I saw said that there was water trapped in the crust equivalent to the amount that's in the Arctic Ocean - way short of global flood levels.
"I do this real moron thing, and it's called thinking. And apparently I'm not a very good American because I like to form my own opinions."
— George Carlin
I think the list, if we are to be fair to all should be titled "Impossible things people believe".
All that crap in that list stems from the naked assertion that the super natural exists.
Ouija boards
Lucky socks
4 leaf clovers
SAME CRAP. Superstition is superstition.
"We are a nation of Christians and Muslims, Jews and Hindus -- and nonbelievers."Obama
Check out my poetry here on Rational Responders Like my poetry thread on Facebook under Brian James Rational Poet, @Brianrrs37 on Twitter and my blog at www.brianjamesrationalpoet.blog
Welcome!
Sex always wins.
Enlightened Atheist, Gaming God.
It's natural selection. I select you, and you and you - and you over there playing with the snake...
"Experiments are the only means of knowledge at our disposal. The rest is poetry, imagination." Max Planck
Humans living with dinosaurs...come on
There's water beneath the earth here in Idaho - farmers use it to water crops since Idaho is essentially a desert. It's called an aquifer and the water is brought to the surface using a magical technique called "pumps." Otherwise, it tends to stay down there beause we have this condition called gravity that keeps it there.
Jesus floated up into heaven, so you've got levitatioin, a magical ability to survive the rigors of vacuum, space travel, and inter-dimensional travel, since if it was in our own universe we'd be able to spot it. I hope he took a snack for the trip. Mohammad had a better idea - he used a flying horse.
Now, the Bible says that the water covered the highest mountains, which means that the mountains were not quite so tall, based on the number of cubits mentioned. In fact, by definition, all mountains are higher than the depth of the water or they wouldn't be mountains.
Ya got fifteen cubits and a cubit is based upon the length of a forearm, so it's ~ 18". Woo, but that sounds deep, nu?
What about an earth with a variable mass that remained in the same orbit?
Surely adding kilometres of water to the entire surface of the earth would alter its mass?
"Experiments are the only means of knowledge at our disposal. The rest is poetry, imagination." Max Planck
Just a minor not Herk but there are mountains in the ocean. If the base to peak measurement is used, then those that are shorter than the depth of the ocean at that place are called sea mounts. If the base to peak is greater than the depth of the ocean, then they are called islands.
Interestingly, while mount Everest is the highest mountain in the world, the actual tallest mountain is Mauna Kea. Stats according to wikipedia:
The peak of Mauna Kea is 13,803 feet (4,207 m) above mean sea level but 33,476 feet (10,203 m) above its base on the floor of the Pacific Ocean.
=
WHAT! You mean my pink argyle socks aren't lucky after all? Damn....
I love that God is Benevolent but killed a town full of innocent first-borns.
I asked my Christian friend to explain that one to me. I'm still waiting for a "good" answer.
Einstein wrote a general and specific relativity theory.
He argues that space and time are just four dimensions of the same ´matter´. He implies that, if you can travel through space, it is also possible to travel through time.
Jewish rabbi: God only invented time to prevent all things from happening at the same moment.
Time travel would indeed be an impossible thing to believe in.
Is that bad?
your friend might say that innocent people would go straight to heaven.
I guess that heaven is ´paradise´ - if it would exist of course. So, maybe dying is not so bad a punishment after all.
Given that you are innocent, otherwise there is HELLLL hooooooohh scary.