Shadows Drink Hemlock, By Brian37
Offline The daggers of plumes
From old to new
Allegories and flames
Cave walls give way
Give way to truth
Corruption of youth
Teachers and oracles
Authoritarians lose
They think they know
Of what they defend
Those ravenous jackals
Like to pretend
Like to pretend
The shadows are real
But I have left the cave
And know of the truth
Orbiting telliscopes
Kill your oracles
Pulpit soothsayers
Are nothing but liers
My childhood window
Gave me such fright
In twilight hours
On cloudy nights
Rustling wind
Howled at me
My darkened room
Gave sanctuary
Gave sanctuary
To my deepest fear
Invisible things
Creeping near
Then one night
I stared them down
The goblins vanished
When my iris expanded
Yet, those of years
Still hold fears
Of permanent torture
In fictional flames
You don't get it
Cant you see
From Dante we parted
And his absurdity
I don't play with Styx
But you still throw rocks
To protect the shadows
On the cave wall
You are that kid
I once was
Holding your nukes
Hiding under the covers
I have left the cave
And fear not tyrants
Microscopes trump myth
And their vacuous sirens
Nothing invisible
Creeps anywhere
Not in the cosmos
Or under your bed
Shadows drink hemlock
Brings death to fear
The sunlight of scrutiny
Freed me from the cave
"We are a nation of Christians and Muslims, Jews and Hindus -- and nonbelievers."Obama
Check out my poetry here on Rational Responders Like my poetry thread on Facebook under Brian James Rational Poet, @Brianrrs37 on Twitter and my blog at www.brianjamesrationalpoet.blog
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You should give me more tips on how you write in this more traditional form. This is good and its really funny man because I just wrote a poem this morning about my own childhood escape from belief in god! It's just cool I totally felt what you were saying and I love the allusion to hemlock drinking shadows that's just cool, like some Socrates juxtaposition.
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Sanity is not statistical ~Orwell~
I am glad you liked this particular poem, but the best advice I can give you is to not take advice from me. I mentioned in your last poem thread why, go read that. I am not an expert nor do I claim to be. For me my writing is hit or miss. That is my approach but that is not everyone's approach.
I've seen plenty of others I'd advise you to pick their brains. I do this for myself, I don't want you to be a clone of me, nor should you be a clone of anyone. Be yourself, read other's, enjoy, and decide for yourself how you want to approach it.
Don't try to copy others, that is not the goal. Soak in everything and be yourself and decide for yourself.
My block form style is the one I am comfortable with and drives others nuts. But after seeing an entire Plath book in this same style, I defend the style. Style is still a different subject than word choice or imagery. And I have to admit I drop bombs more than I drop a rose when it comes to word choice and imagery.
Me personally, I don't expect a poem to be written like a sonnet or that it's meter has to be musical and perfect. But again, look around, read everything, don't hinge what you write on what I say or what I like, I am not you.
"We are a nation of Christians and Muslims, Jews and Hindus -- and nonbelievers."Obama
Check out my poetry here on Rational Responders Like my poetry thread on Facebook under Brian James Rational Poet, @Brianrrs37 on Twitter and my blog at www.brianjamesrationalpoet.blog