Thinking For Ourselves
I had the unfortunate pleasure of watching the news the other night. You see, I don't enjoy watching the news and it's not for the reasons you probably suspect. It's not that the bad news is the problem, the world sucks and there is lots of bad news out there if you insist on wanting to hear about it. No, I don't watch the news because I am of the firm belief that the word "media" is simply simple way of saying "money grubbing, panic inciting, idiocy spreading propagandist".
At any rate, I was listening to these hacks talk about nonsense and they started taking about this story of parents and their child raising tactics. Now, this was a pretty extreme story so naturally it caught my attention. This mom and dad were apparently having sex and masturbating in front of their 8 or 9 (I can't remember) year old kid.
Ok, freak out. Get it out of your system.
Now, I am not trying to present an opinion on whether this is right or wrong, so also get that out of your system.
My darling wife who I have mountains of respect for said something along the lines of "that's just going to far, the kid is 8 years old". Which I have to admit, was also my first reaction to hearing it. Then about a half of a second later I asked myself "but why?". You see, I had an emotional reaction to something like my wife did, but what does that even mean?
Let me clear something up, in the off chance that you didn't already know this. That emotional reaction that we have to things...the thing that just pops in your head and immediatly you have an opinion about? ... that's programming. Good or bad, you don't have any control over that reaction becuase it is the automatic response based on how we are programmed.
For example: the US is a country that is DEEPLY sexually repressed in a number of ways. Germany is a country that I imagine is sexually repressed in their own way but not in the Puritanical idiotic way that we are. Now, a person in Germany would likely have a different knee jerk reaction to hearing that news article than we would. Why? Is it because they're just sick and all need to die because we're right an they're wrong? Hardly. They are programmed differently. Your body, mind, and emotions do what they are trained to do, nothing more.
This is where my opinion comes in: we must learn to ask "but why" when we have those emotional knee jerk reactions. If we are ever going to be a people of enlightenment, a people not ruled by fear and hate, we must learn to ask "but why?". Otherwise we are just rehashing the opinions and lives of those that have come before us, and they were merely mumbling through life repeating what THEY were told.
THINK!
Think for just a moment.
Is it wrong to have sex in front of a child because you want them to learn something about sex? Is it wrong to have sex in front of a child because you are just a perv? Perhaps it is, but think rationally for a moment and question why. How EXACLY is it harmful to the child to learn about and see sex at such a young age?
Whatever your immediate reaction to the question was... throw it out. That reaction doesn't mean shit. You didn't even have a thought to get that reaction, you were just doing as you are told.
Do you always do as you are told? Or sometimes do you stop and question why? To think for yourself?
Polyamory or Promiscuity?
http://www.anopenrelationship.com/2011/02/polyamory-or-promiscuity/
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I dont think anyone here is
I dont think anyone here is advocating teaching kids that sex is yucky in all cases.
But, in asking why, you also have to ask yourself at what age of developement is a child ready.
If it makes no sense to teach something as complex as deity belief to a child, how can they handle sex at that age? Sexual realitionships also has complexities that can only be understood over time.
Granted, we cant make blanket statements as to each individual and their intelectual process and development. But we sure shouldnt blindside the unsuspecting when they might not be well armed.
Certainly it is absurd to react to a boob with a baby sucking on the nipple in public. But, I'd also not expose those not ready.
If you want to argue grey area, that is understandable. But to make blanket statements as to it being fine all the time in every context is not wise.
Let me add, there ar pleanty of atheists here that would rip someone's head off and not give one ratts ass about an "explination" as to why someone would stroke themeleves in front of a child. I would too.
Conflate the grey area to absurdity if you wish. If one is talking about 17 year old dating a 16 year old that is one thing. But even with adults, if you think anybody wants a person uninvited to jack off in front of them, I dont care what their age is.
I dont care if Pat Robertson wacked off in front of me, I dont want to see it. It is called common courtacy. Taking a shit is natural, but you dont do it in public.
Wacking off is fine. But how much does a child understand between being manipulated and mutual concent? The younger a child is, the less experiance they have, the more of a spounge they are and the more easly they can be manipulated or forced.
"We are a nation of Christians and Muslims, Jews and Hindus -- and nonbelievers."Obama
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Interestingly enough,
Interestingly enough, parents having sex in front of children used to be the norm. After all, most people lived in one room huts. It was not considered at all inappropriate. (I took a class in adolescent literature and we discussed the evolution of the childhood concept). You're quite right, what is and is not appropriate for children is both cultural and ideological. Such ideas are neither inherent nor organic. They are taught.
I get the idea that this
I get the idea that this post is nothing really about whether or not kids should be exposed to sex at 8 years of age. It's about the perfectly reasonable idea that when we have a knee jerk reaction to something we should stand back a moment and think rationally about why we are having that reaction and what is really the truth of the matter at hand. I find myself needing to do this quite often internet forum debates--nice thing about internet debate is that you don't have to respond immediately.
But bravo to Brian37 anyway, since I see that he is actually stepping back and rationally examining the particular issue that was used as an example.
-Mikel
Shane Douglas is right.
Shane Douglas is right. Think differently. My initial reaction to this "sex in front of your 8 year old" was to have no reaction at all. It's really none of my business what they do around their child.
Think for yourself.
My initial reaction to the Virginia Tech shootings was an indifferent shrug of the shoulders, followed by an emphatic "eh". And that initial reaction changed very little as the events of that day unfolded. Was it a tragedy? Yeah, sure. But you know what? Better them than me. Besides, of the 32 victims, probability alone says that at least 18 of them were huge assholes that, in the long run, the world is better off without.
Mikayla_Starstuff wrote: I
Exactly the point.
And yes, I would agree, Brian does indeed sound like he had given the topic some thought. Whether or not we agree upon the result is irrelivant (at least for this purpose).